It Gets Greater Later
Being a new, 24 year old mom was a job within itself; but adding a full-time job and school to the mix really forced me to challenge myself. The fact that my family was over 300 miles away and not even a fourth cousin twice removed was in the same city as me, further forced me to challenge myself at times.
My mom is my life-long, best friend and I literally talked to her 10 times a day! On my way to the babysitter's house, on the way from the babysitter's house while driving to work, during my morning break, during lunch break, during my evening break, on the way to the babysitter's house, on the way from the babysitter's house while driving home, while I was cooking dinner, after dinner, and at bedtime. This was our schedule every day! I am sure you are thinking like many others have said "what can you possibly have to talk about that would call for so many phone calls?" The answer to that would be "nothing". My mother is an extremely, protective mother. She cannot rest knowing that her little chicks are out and about and not safely within her reach. She worried and still worries about us all to the point of insanity, so I found it easier to talk to her in multiple segments throughout the day as oppose to her having a nervous breakdown or stroke because she ran her blood pressure up needing to hear from me!
Although, the majority of our calls were made up of my mother talking away; and me just saying "mmmhmm" or "yes ma'am" there were still those conversations that were encouraging and uplifting. It is not easy being a mom in any sense of the word. I like to say that being a mom is the easiest job to get but the hardest one to do. I would call my mom at time ready to pull my hair out! She would bestow her wisdom on me and end every conversation with "it gets greater later". I wanted so badly to ask her "when?" at times, but decided against it.
As I mentioned earlier, I had no family (aside from my boyfriend's family) near me. I must admit that I was not too close to the in-laws and this made for even more challenging times. I swore my mother-in-law hated me, and just knew my sister-in-laws wanted me dead! I felt such loneliness and sadness, being away from my family. But I was stuck on stubborn and refused to leave my boyfriend and go back home because I just knew that one day we would be married; and I wasn't giving up my dream wedding for anybody!
Financially, we struggled at times. We were still learning that a raise or bonus does not equal a new flat-screen television but should go into a savings account. Payday had become my sworn enemy. Twice a month I had to formulate a strategic plan that explained how I was going to rob Peter to pay Paul! I could always turn to my parents for financial assistance but HATED doing it! Not because they minded, but because I felt it made seem incapable of being a mother. They did not feel this way whatsoever, it was this preconceived idea in my mind. I would call my mom sounding down and without me saying anything she would say "it gets greater later" and "I deposited $100 on your account". I would put up an insincere fight for a few tries all the while knowing I needed the extra cash. I would thank her and she would reiterate again "it gets greater later".
As the days, weeks, and months passed I felt as though I was aging with the speed of lightning! My daughter was quickly growing along with my responsibilities. I felt as though I was not myself any longer, but this robot that was set to auto-pilot and I just lived out each day. My life was not my own anymore, it belonged to an infant that relied on me, a boyfriend that needed me as much as I did him, a boss that should be in an insane asylum, and a school that expected me to be a good student. When I got to my boiling point I was surprised by my own reaction.
For the first time in my life, I felt this urgency to pick up the phone and call my mom. I needed to thank her for being my mom; and for all of the sacrifices she made for me. I had a new found respect for my mom, motherhood and for myself even! I needed to tell her immediately! So I ran for my cell phone, picked it up and dialed her number. A woman's voice came on the other end, a familiar voice that was not my mother's. The voice was an automated service that informed me that my cell phone had been deactivated and that a payment was needed...
Yeah, sorry mom I guess my ode to you is going to have to wait until later. But by then it should be even greater!
My mom is my life-long, best friend and I literally talked to her 10 times a day! On my way to the babysitter's house, on the way from the babysitter's house while driving to work, during my morning break, during lunch break, during my evening break, on the way to the babysitter's house, on the way from the babysitter's house while driving home, while I was cooking dinner, after dinner, and at bedtime. This was our schedule every day! I am sure you are thinking like many others have said "what can you possibly have to talk about that would call for so many phone calls?" The answer to that would be "nothing". My mother is an extremely, protective mother. She cannot rest knowing that her little chicks are out and about and not safely within her reach. She worried and still worries about us all to the point of insanity, so I found it easier to talk to her in multiple segments throughout the day as oppose to her having a nervous breakdown or stroke because she ran her blood pressure up needing to hear from me!
Although, the majority of our calls were made up of my mother talking away; and me just saying "mmmhmm" or "yes ma'am" there were still those conversations that were encouraging and uplifting. It is not easy being a mom in any sense of the word. I like to say that being a mom is the easiest job to get but the hardest one to do. I would call my mom at time ready to pull my hair out! She would bestow her wisdom on me and end every conversation with "it gets greater later". I wanted so badly to ask her "when?" at times, but decided against it.
As I mentioned earlier, I had no family (aside from my boyfriend's family) near me. I must admit that I was not too close to the in-laws and this made for even more challenging times. I swore my mother-in-law hated me, and just knew my sister-in-laws wanted me dead! I felt such loneliness and sadness, being away from my family. But I was stuck on stubborn and refused to leave my boyfriend and go back home because I just knew that one day we would be married; and I wasn't giving up my dream wedding for anybody!
Financially, we struggled at times. We were still learning that a raise or bonus does not equal a new flat-screen television but should go into a savings account. Payday had become my sworn enemy. Twice a month I had to formulate a strategic plan that explained how I was going to rob Peter to pay Paul! I could always turn to my parents for financial assistance but HATED doing it! Not because they minded, but because I felt it made seem incapable of being a mother. They did not feel this way whatsoever, it was this preconceived idea in my mind. I would call my mom sounding down and without me saying anything she would say "it gets greater later" and "I deposited $100 on your account". I would put up an insincere fight for a few tries all the while knowing I needed the extra cash. I would thank her and she would reiterate again "it gets greater later".
As the days, weeks, and months passed I felt as though I was aging with the speed of lightning! My daughter was quickly growing along with my responsibilities. I felt as though I was not myself any longer, but this robot that was set to auto-pilot and I just lived out each day. My life was not my own anymore, it belonged to an infant that relied on me, a boyfriend that needed me as much as I did him, a boss that should be in an insane asylum, and a school that expected me to be a good student. When I got to my boiling point I was surprised by my own reaction.
For the first time in my life, I felt this urgency to pick up the phone and call my mom. I needed to thank her for being my mom; and for all of the sacrifices she made for me. I had a new found respect for my mom, motherhood and for myself even! I needed to tell her immediately! So I ran for my cell phone, picked it up and dialed her number. A woman's voice came on the other end, a familiar voice that was not my mother's. The voice was an automated service that informed me that my cell phone had been deactivated and that a payment was needed...
Yeah, sorry mom I guess my ode to you is going to have to wait until later. But by then it should be even greater!
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